Shared Situation? Try This!

You probably have some shared situations with friends, family, coworkers, neighbors or others. This video shows you how to access and start using the Shared Situation Guide on your desktop or mobile. Your shared situation can be whatever your group is dealing with or considering. A shared situation might be a problem, challenge, opportunity, place, set of circumstances, something you’re managing or working on together, and so on. With smartphones, we have new possibilities. For more, see

Shifting Your Attention


You need to shift your attention between elements, relationships and the proximity. An over-emphasis on any one of these can be less effective.

This is also true when thinking about yourself. Sometimes see yourself as an element, sometimes a relationship or relationships, and sometimes either as a proximity or as part of your proximity. Then shift again.

Sometimes it’s possible to take two or three of these perspectives at once. Then shift again.

To find out more about what I mean by elements, relationships and the proximity, join

Proxri Deal: As you find our relationship rewarding, proxri with the proximity in mind.

Slowing Down Violence


Perhaps the one of the best ways to slow down violence is to create proximities so engaging, enticing and rewarding that people wouldn’t even really think about doing something (like violence) to deny themselves being a part of these proximities.

This method is something nature uses. Consider sex. Sex is so great you wouldn’t really think about cutting it out of your life completely. Sex is a proximity which is engaging, enticing and rewarding.

So how could we more consistently create engaging, enticing and rewarding proximities, and in doing so slow down violence? I think ProxThink and the ProxThink Growth Model could be of some service to us. Together, they provide some ideas, tools, models and processes which people can interpret for their proximities. They were designed to capture some of what good relationships are about, and what creativity is about, both of which people find engaging, enticing and rewarding.

To find out more about what I mean by “proximity,” as well as the ProxThink set of ideas and the ProxThink Growth Model, join

Proxri Deal: As you find our relationship rewarding, proxri with the proximity in mind.

My TED Wish


The TED Prize was created as a way of taking the inspiration, ideas and resources that are generated at TED and using them to make a difference. Each winner is granted a wish. If I were to win a TED Prize, this would be my wish.

I wish that the ProxThink Growth Model would be adopted and adapted widely, and that it would become a viable evolution for capitalism and/or parallel process to capitalism. This wish would be aided by people becoming more and more: 1) honest and transparent with their ProxMonitors, 2) creative with their Vadi Agreements, 3) active about their RelatePoints, and 4) generous with their ProxRewards (proxri). This wish would be aided by widespread data and network availability to coordinate these four items, yet also widespread low-tech implementations as well. This wish would be aided by heightened senses of and qualities of relationships and boundaries, as well as heightened creativity, flexibility and fun, which the ProxThink Basics and ProxPatterns could serve and support, in addition to serving and supporting items 1 through 4 above. I believe progress towards this wish could serve us in our challenges with climate change, conflict at many scales, and growth along many dimensions, including personal growth and the growth of groups of people.

To find out more, please join

Proxri Deal: As you find our relationship rewarding, proxri with the proximity in mind.

Transitions as Doorways


Perhaps a good way to view personal transitions is as a doorway. When you go through a doorway, you move into a proximity that is pretty different from where or when you were.

Viewing personal transitions as doorways can work in mundane transitions, like getting up in the morning or starting a new project. It can also work for more major transitions, like changes in your life or beliefs or circumstances.

See your transition as a doorway. Move through the doorway into a new proximity.

Proxri Deal: As you find our relationship rewarding, proxri with the proximity in mind.